Grandma turns 100, a cool fly, smoke rings, a sculpture, a kitty, and a lack of self awareness

Another random mishmash of thoughts and observations. I have not yet achieved the "write less, more often" goal.

I have been a bit too busy for my taste the last few months. Work has taken a lot of mental energy. My cat Digs has had ongoing health issues and will be having surgery tomorrow. I was out of town all last week doing a really emotionally intense training for work. I feel like there have been a lot of social things? I’m honestly not sure anymore. It’s all becoming a blur. I have almost entirely dropped the iNaturalist habit entirely. I have still been going out and taking pictures, but have not kept it up as a daily habit. And I haven’t pulled anything off my camera in over a week. I’ll get back into it soon enough though.

Not a wasp

I spotted this fly hanging out on a flower a week or so ago. It wasn’t easily disturbed by my camera or my rearanging of leaves to get a clearer view.

Probably something from the genus Physocephala, a member of Thick-headed Flies (Family Conopidae)

If this is in the genus Physocephala Bugguide says they are parasitoids of insects in the ants-wasps-bees group (hymenoptera), that they hang out on flowers waiting for something to visit and then grab on and pry open a “crack” in its abdomen and get an egg in there, which will eventually hatch and eat the host’s delicious insides and evenually kill it.

I think this is probably Physocephala tibialis which is a parasitoid of bumblebees, and I have seen them before in this area. I still am no good at identifying stuff with keys, but it doesn’t matter. They exist and are interesting whether this is one or not.

I am glad that, as a human, I don’t have to worry about a weird human shaped creature hanging out in the baked goods case, waiting for me to reach in to get a donut so it can start a family in my torso. While there are things that would happily lay eggs in me, they’re not in Wegmans, and they’re not Alien chest bursters.

Grandma is 100 Years Old!

My grandma, Edith, turned 100 on Saturday and we gathered at the farm to celebrate.

Lots of pictures to choose from but I like this one because of the observer in the window, and the bajillion phone photographers.

Everyone seemed to have a good time. Later in the day we fired up the smoke ring cannon and tried to shoot cans off of Todd’s head.

Robin operating the smoke ring cannon.

Todd and grandma years ago. How many? I do not know. You’ve got to aim high to shoot a can off of Todd’s head.

Make Hay While the Sun Shines

My dad and my aunt Becky collaborated on this weathervane that they are calling “Make Hay While the Sun Shines.” I helped a little bit getting it installed on Sunday. My dad is trying to figure out what color to paint the parts that aren’t hay forks. Green seems obvious but it feels like it’ll blend into the background. I said blue but now I’m thinking, some plants have a reddish brownish purple color that could work as a stem and leaves and still stand out. He should probably ask Becky though, she is probably better at those aesthetic choices than any of us.

Digs’abetes and foot surgery

I can’t remember where the Digs health saga was when I last wrote. We have escalated from oral diabetes meds to insulin injections. I was so scared of having to give him a shot every day, but it turns out it’s acutally not that hard, except that the amounts are so tiny that I CANNOT read the measurements on the needles without my glasses.

We have switched to paper litter because the clumping litter kept getting in his foot wound which was making it worse. The new litter isn’t sticking to the wound but there has been a lot of lateral thinking about where to pee now. My favorite boots were old but still possibly my most functional boots. Now they’re old and soaked in cat pee. I think it’s time for new boots. Maybe after he heals from the next surgery.

The wound really hasn’t gotten better. We thought the vet was telling us amputation was the next step but it sounds like there’s a surgery that we can try before amputation. That’s tomorrow. I’m really hoping they can help him feel better. It does not feel good to watch him limping around with an raw open wound and imagine how uncomfortable that must be.

Hilarous Self-Awareness

So I mentioned way back at the beginning that I was at a week-long training for work. It was kind of a better leadership through self-awareness kind of thing and it has a clever name but I will just call it “how to human” for this post.

We talked all about vulnerablility and trust, and different communications styles, and cultural differences. While five days seems like a long time, we crammed a LOT in. It is amazing how much trust can be built in a short amount of time under the right conditions. And also amazing how much we all didn’t know about ourselves and how to human.

Anyway at the end of it we had to write down some strengths, some weaknesses, and a goal that we were going to work on based on everything we had learned about ourselves. I just had a kind of gestalt moment and wrote “trust yourself” because I just kind of knew that was the thing. I still did the strengths and areas for improvement as a kind of proof.

And then I went over to a couple of the facilitators and asked them if “trust myself” was an ok goal for this exercise.

One more time.

I asked someone else
for permission
to trust myself.

They didn’t even laugh at me or point out that I had just proved that this was, indeed something I needed to work on. I mean, they’re very good facilitators. I don’t think they would laugh at someone in a “how to human” class but I might have.

I didn’t realize what I had done until I had packed all my stuff, driven an hour and a half home, unpacked some of my stuff, etc. I was standing in the chicken yard flinging scratch around when it hit me and I just couldn’t stop laughing. I still grin every time I think of it.

A book

I am listening to “Atlas of the Heart” by Brene’ Brown. Someone in the training recommended it. It is so good. I may listen to it again before I return it. I kind of feel like I should have been taking notes.

I have more to say but also need to sleep. So hopefully I’ll remember the other stuff and write again soon.